News at a Glance

By Sarah Masker
Copy Editor

1.) Tartan High School in Minnesota is squashing 18-year-old Mike Stone’s dreams for prom. The high school senior’s date, porn star Megan Piper, is unwelcome at the school due to violations in both school and prom policy. Stone tweeted hundreds of porn actresses with an invitation to the May 12 prom, until Piper finally accepted. She said, “It was a sweet gesture. It was so cute. I couldn’t say no.” She then added, “I don’t plan to show up butt naked or something. I’m going to wear a pretty prom dress.” Stone will hold an alternative party at the same time as the prom so he can bring his date. Are they having an after-prom party too? Wink, wink.

2.) Some dogs, like people, are just naturally clumsy. Others are just drunk. When officers investigated the report of an intoxicated dog at Smith’s Bar in Montana, they found poor little Arly II, a Pomeranian, unable to walk in a straight line without falling over. A customer who claimed part ownership of Arly II said that 49-year-old Todd Schrier had given the dog a “to-go cup of vodka.” A vet found Arly II’s blood-alcohol level to be 0.348 percent, which is four times the limit for driving and almost a fatal level for humans. Schrier has been charged with animal cruelty, while Arly II probably suffered a monster hangover.

3.) An allergy to water could be pretty problematic. Dr. Alan Baptist, associate program director for allergy and immunology at the University of Michigan, encountered this unfortunate allergy when a young woman came into his office complaining of migraine-like pain, headaches, and reddish skin welts that occurred when she came into contact with water. The condition, known as aquagenic urticaria, or water-caused hives, is very rare but might be seriously under-diagnosed. Fortunately, people with water-caused hives can drink liquids because the reaction occurs only when the outer skin contacts water. However, sufferers of this allergy can have reactions to their own tears, sweat, and saliva. In other words, passionate make-out sessions are a no-no.

4.) Studies have shown that hugging and other human contact actually has health benefits, but a New Jersey school superintendent has deemed the district’s schools as hug-free zones. That’s right; there is now a policy against hugging due to some “incidents of unsuitable, physical interactions.” He added that the whole policy is being blown out of proportion, but what did he expect? I don’t think Barney would approve of this.

5.) Faking sick to get out of work is one thing, but cutting off a limb is going too far. An unemployed Austrian man sawed his foot off, apparently to avoid being found fit to go back to work. Hours before his appointment at the labor office to check on his health, the 56-year-old man severed his foot just above the ankle with an electric saw in his home workshop. He then threw the foot into an oven, hobbled to his garage, and called an ambulance. An emergency operation was unable to reattach the foot. So how do you say crazy in German?

6.) The ninjas are out and about. Two people in ninja costumes robbed a medical marijuana delivery man in California as he was headed to his car. The victim, in his 40s, was so scared that he dropped a bag containing money and marijuana, which the attackers then stole. Police Lt. Alan Henley says he knows of no other ninja-style thefts recently. Good to know.

7.) Sugar, a deaf cat, recently plunged 19 stories in Boston and lived to tell the tale after a successful landing. The cat fell into a tiny mulch patch surrounded by brick and concrete. A woman in the building said she saw a “white streak” go by her window and then saw Sugar after she hit the ground. Mike Brammer, assistant manager of the animal rescue services department at the Animal Rescue League of Boston said, “You could see the impact crater where she actually did hit the ground and she actually lost some fur in the hole, too.” Sugar, go ahead and subtract a life, and then stay away from windows.

8.) At Holmes County High School in Florida, not only do the students get spanked, but the woodshop class makes the paddles. The class fashions a lightweight paddle of ash wood, measuring about 16 inches long, five inches wide and half an inch thick. Florida is among 19 states that permit school staff to use corporal punishment; Maryland is not on that list, so it looks like WC students are safe for now.

9.) There’s some weird stuff in Hawaii…unique orchids, funky fish, the smoke monster from “Lost”. Now the island chain has one more claim to fame, as a grapefruit-sized hailstone recently hit Oahu and became the largest hailstone on record in Hawaii. There is no record of hail larger than one inch in diameter, but this hailstone measured 4 ¼ inches long, 2 ¼ inches tall, and two inches wide. Other famous American hailstones include one that measured eight inches and weighed 1.9 pounds, and another with the nation’s largest circumference at 18.75 inches. Windshields better watch out.

10.) If you missed out seeing Batman driving around in his Batmobile, this is the time to buy the first check sent to Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster for their creation of Superman. Made out for $412, the check paid for full ownership and rights and paved the way for a booming industry with comic books, TV, radio and films. Vincent Zurzolo, a co-owner of ComicConnect, said, “Without this check…there would be no Superman, and thereby no Batman, Wonder Woman, Spider-Man, X-Men, or any of the other characters that came into existence after the concept of the superhero was born with Superman.” That would be one boring world.

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