By Tom Gunner
Fashion Guru

Straight out of “Project Runway’s” 25th season finale (no, not series finale), comes the “Han Solo Feminique” style seen on college campuses all around the United States. This space cowboy style was developed over the past 30 years from the sensationally retroactive mind of designer Hans Fälsch. When his models first marched down the runway, the crowd gasped in amazement and nostalgia. The judges were awestruck. Some laughed, others wept, and some even needed medical support.

Previously known for bringing back ‘70s chest hair, Fälsch got his idea while teaching at the New York University of Fashion, where he saw countless young women wearing blue denim, white long-sleeves, high boots, and black vests. After several were hospitalized in this dramatic unveiling, Fälsch accepted any interviews. He told one reporter of the genesis of his style, “I saw zis style und I thought, ‘Hey. I have seen zat before!’ And it was zen zat I remembered my boyhood days watsching Han Solo save ze day in ze ‘Star Wars’ trilogy.” Harrison Ford of course had no idea his signature roguish style would be adopted years later nationwide in a sweep that has rivaled Ugg boots and yoga pants.

After this initial recognition, Fälsch published his best-selling book “How to Sell Out Like George Lucas & Get Away With It, Too” which went on to be a New York Times best-seller and gained the attention of Oprah, who distributed it across several third world countries where they unfortunately recycled it for kindling. Fälsch is pleased to announce that he will be creating a “Han Solo Cup” line for men soon enough, so they can make beer pong socially acceptable in virtually any public setting.

The Elm

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