A Goose and A Gander: Let’s talk about sex… and relationships, and dating, and everything in between!

By Nick Anstett and Kaitlyn Fowler

Elm Staff Writers


This week, Nick and Kaitlyn are discussing fun things to do with that Valentine of yours.  Tired of the same old thing on this love filled holiday? Try one of Nick or Kaitlyn’s suggestions and you will surely have a great day.  Next week, Nick and Kaitlyn review “Fifty Shades of Grey,” and discuss how it may or may not work in your relationship.


Nick says… So let’s say that everything worked out and that you have successfully gotten yourself a date for Valentine’s Day. Great. Good job. Now what? Well the natural step is to actually find something for the two of you to do. While there’s always the traditional fancy dinner, trip to the movies (if you want to join the throngs of couples and women going to see “Fifty Shades of Gray”), or maybe an evening in with some wine and Netflix. If you’re the adventurous type or maybe just up for doing something a little more fun here are some other suggestions.

In my experience the dates that I’ve always enjoyed the most and found the most memorable involved a bit of improvisation, adventure, and cooperation. In short, sometimes it’s best to go into a date with a general scope of ideas rather than a strict schedule. Allow room for spur of the moment decisions, changes in direction, and bursts of inspiration. Maybe plan to go out somewhere in town, but let the two of you come naturally to a decision based upon how you’re feeling. Or maybe start the date early and plan from there. One experience that I had that was rather fun was ordering different parts of a meal at different locations. Grab an appetizer at one location, an entrée at another, and dessert at a local bakery or ice cream stand. Then finish off at the local bar for drinks. You’re allowing for fun, genuine interaction with your date.

One suggestion I heard once was set a “date budget.” Decide the maximum amount of money that you’ll spend for the date at the start and just go crazy from there. As long as you don’t exceed your set number you’re free to experiment and adventure as much as you want.


Have fun and experiment. Romance is fun, but sometimes the best dates and memories come from a little bit of flexibility and a little bit of chemistry. All the same, don’t use this as an attempt to go into your date with half the effort. This is a way to experiment and have fun, not an excuse to be a lazy date.

Kaitlyn says… Valentine’s Day is almost here folks. For those of you who have a special someone to share this holiday with, now is the time to be thinking of what you will be doing that day. The day is all about love, and you don’t need to have anything super extravagant planned to say that. If you do want some ideas of cute date, why don’t you think about something along these lines?

1. Scenic Chestertown: I don’t know if you guys have noticed, but we live in a seriously beautiful area. If it’s not too cold out Saturday you can wander into town, maybe grab a snack at Play It Again, Sam or Evergrain and go sit by the river or the boathouse. Just talk, and maybe, depending on when you go watch the sunset reflect on the water before you wander back to campus at dusk. Maybe you could even round the night off with some stargazing on the Green. We live in a beautiful, romantic place; don’t ignore that when you are looking for a little love.

2. Dinner for Two: I know a lot of you are thinking about grabbing dinner together, whether it’s Fish Whistle, The Lemon Leaf Cafe, or even Domino’s. Maybe you are thinking about cooking a special dinner yourself. A great way to make it about both of you is to make dinner together. If you both like to cook spend some time together goofing off in the kitchen. Make something you can both be proud of, even if you will eat it eventually. If you really want to make something special pre-make a dessert to surprise them. As cheesy as it is, something like a heart-shaped cake or brownies in the shape of hearts may just melt the heart of that special someone as well.


3. Homage to Them: The title for this category is a little strange, but just hear me out. There is a reason you like this particular person you are choosing to spend Valentine’s Day with. There is no one out there in the world quite like them. Recognize that. If you get dinner, get something that for example a character in their favorite book eats. Get flowers that are their favorite color, and that random candy that only they like. Find their favorite movie and watch it with them. You can say “I love you” as many times and in as many different languages as you want, but actions speak louder than words. You know who they are, and you love the things about them that make them this way. You know it, now let them know it too.

For those of you who already have big plans laid out, kudos to you. If you don’t that’s fine. Unless you are hiring a marching band or designing an ice sculpture you still have some time to figure things out. It doesn’t have to be something big and flashy to show you care. It just has to come from the heart.

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