So now that Old Man Winter is fast approaching, all I can do is dream about Spring and the return of warm weather. In the midst of my mind's warm weather wanderings, I have come upon a topic very dear to my heart: May Day.
Just as the disappearance of the stench of sandals bids farewell to summer, May Day, in an equally potent way, bids hello. It's that wonderful time of the year when it just becomes warm enough for the limbs to hang out as free as a bird in the sky, or the bird that you get (gratis) commenting upon female genitalia. I believe even Franklin Roosevelt said himself, it is a "day of infamy."
The climax of the May Day tradition is the flag pole gathering just before midnight. Imagine this: Bodies mingling, beer flowing, bellowing issued forth from a thousand WACers (no pun intended), and a lone male, clad with sunglasses, a black vest, and a bike helmet (note the lack of the most necessary raiment), riding his bike among the crowd, parting the sea of people like Moses. That was me- a disgrace to the flag I rode around, I assure you. Anyway, this is the glory of the May Day gala.
But despite the fun and the fanatics of the great day, the tradition is a bit misleading. It seems that though we are a group of educated people, when it comes to celebrating or having fun, we are nothing but a bunch of barbaric idiots. Don't get me wrong- I have nothing against idiots. I love being an idiot now and again.
After a semester of grueling academic work, it's high time to bring out the primordial club and bash my brain with alcohol, because it's fun and stupid. But then again, being the more educated people of the world, perhaps we should establish a tradition representative of our recognition of the importance of the coming of Spring (of course with all the alcoholic and nude accessories).
Perhaps we can look to a recent Harvard tradition as a paradigm for our own May Day. Although it's not a naked festivity per se, it has some interesting roots behind its wild procession- something we can learn from here at WAC.
According to David Fahrenthold of the Harvard Crimson Online, The name of the game is the "Wyld Hunt," and it just occurred on Saturday, October 24th. Fahrenthold reports, "The pack numbers about 15, clad in spandex and blue body paint. Traffic stops on JFK Street as they bound across, barking and snarling into the headlights. Then it's down Brattle Street, stopping once to catch their breath and bay at the moon."
The prey of the hunt is evidently a hapless freshman victim adorned with prey-like antlers. She is then slain on the steps of some church and then carried off to somewhere other than Hades 'defunct.' This is one of the Harvard-Radcliffe Science Fiction Association's (HRSFA) most celebrated traditions, which commemorates the Hunter's Moon. Erin R. Leonard, the freshman victim, admits "Everybody's crazy," as she paints herself before the ritualistic murder.
Fahrenthold states, "HRSFA members concentrating in Folklore and Mythology dreamed up the Wyld Hunt early in the 1990's, and imbued it with a mix of Celtic and Germanic traditions. The blue paint is meant to simulate woad- the hallucinogenic paint used by Celtic Warriors to induce a battle frenzy (remember Braveheart?)."
Sometime after the hunt, students also converge upon the Widener Library steps, yelling, "All Hail Chronos" in order to pay tribute to the end of Daylight Savings Time. Later that night, speeches are made about the god Chronos, who allowed the earth an extra hour, while students romp around the Yard clad in black.
Evidently, in the spring, the counterpart to this uncanny tradition is the "Myld Hunt," which is, according to Fahrenthold, "a leisurely stroll after a slow-moving fox, ending with tea and croquet at the Quad." Thus, it is well-demonstrated that Harvard has some outrageously fun, yet clever traditions.
But when it comes to May Day, I'm a bit disappointed in the lack of ingenuity that goes into the day that celebrates the birth of natural world and the rebirth of patriotism. Nudity combined with a flag just doesn't cut it for me. In riding nude on a bike last year, I guess I was trying to transcend mediocrity- adding a little spice to a slightly bland tradition. But I knew I failed the moment my glutius maximus maximized its surface area on the wet, un-enchanting bike seat.
In any event, anyone can strip down and drink beer around a flag, as long as one avoids Chestertown's finest. Although I don't want to be the one to suggest any new methods to celebrate May Day, as it should be a communal effort, all I want to say is that May Day needs more pizzazz. So let's give it up and spend more effort on May Day than what our family jewels are worth!
300 Washington Avenue, Chestertown, Maryland 21620 | 410-778-2800 | 800-422-1782