Making a male climax isn't at all challenging. Insert somewhere close, preferably moist, thrust, repeat. Now making a woman come; therein lies the challenge. If a woman makes a guy come, it's standard. A guy makes a woman come, it's talent. - Dante from "Clerks"
Sex is better than sports because you can play as many positions as you'd like.
Ignoring the fact that after this article everyone at school (professors and girls I may be interested in) as well as curious parties outside of school (I don't give my parents enough credit) will know in graphic intimate detail what goes on behind these cardboard college dormitory doors, it's my duty as a straight male columnist to present the difficult algorithm behind sexual positions.
It's a tradeoff between control and pleasure. My favorite sexual position is one where the woman receives the most pleasure and I do the least work.
Men, as a members of a gender that is almost completely aroused through visuals, enjoy the woman-on-top position for the beautiful view it provides. Meanwhile, the woman is in complete control. This position makes it easy for her to grind on the male, ideally bringing her closer to orgasm.
Although many women don't orgasm strictly from vaginal stimulation, and while both partners should be working together, your orgasm is your responsibility. We usually know when you fake an orgasm; we just don't care since you're only shortchanging yourself in the experience and it's pretty much a given we'll get off regardless.
So while the girl-on-top position is visually pleasing, relaxing for the guy, and provides great stimulation for the girl, if the girl is terrible or the guy a little premature, it can make for sometimes miserable sex.
That's why missionary, or guy-on-top, is the most popular position among men and women, most of them, I imagine, married couples, because it's potentially the tamest position in the book.
While physically it's a simple position to comprehend, in practice, good missionary sex takes a fair amount of skill and balance. Imagine integrating horizontal rhythm into the push-up position and then you'll recognize the inherent difficulty the man must endure.
However, there are lots of variations to the missionary position to make it easier on the male, such as doing it vertically, and switching it up to keep it fresh and fun.
And perhaps the final of the big three positions is the infamous doggie style. This position, favored by both men and women, is when the girl is on all fours with the man entering behind her.
Rhythm comes the easiest in this familiar back and forth motion. Although it's less visual than girl-on-top, doggie style carries with it an exciting degree of dominance and confidence. If the woman's face weren't buried in the pillow, she'd see the smile on the face of the man behind her. It's noteworthy to mention that this is recommended position for backseat car sex, and the most accessible for anal sex.
The inherent irony in all of this is that while women enjoy sex almost nine times more then men, society puts women in a frame where they cannot be sexually active without being labeled with some sense of negative connotation.
My favorite position? Me drunk and her picking up the tab.
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