The Elm Student Newspaper
A Moment of Zen for Graduating Seniors
Volume 80, Issue 25
May 1, 2009
By Erin Stebbings
Elm Staff Writer
In approximately no time at all the lucky seniors of Washington College will be unleashed upon a world that would like us very much to not need jobs, and definitely does not want to have to pay us. Having gone to Washington College, however, we’re all quite accustomed to having copious amounts of work, and, at the very least, being given lovely little checks to put towards our valuable college education. We may have to make some difficult adjustments.
If you have some rather sketchy plans, do not panic. Many other soon-to-be graduates may be regaling you with their impressively designed plans and making you feel as though you are likely to end up selling vital organs in order to pay off your student loans, but I very sincerely doubt any graduate will end up dealing (heavily) in the black market. I can’t reference an exact statistic, but I am fairly certain it is unlikely. In the event such a situation does occur, you are young and most likely healthy, so at least you have a high chance of getting top dollar for your organs. That’s something.
Your youth and health will hopefully be able to serve you prior to organ harvesting as you will probably find it useful if you decide to spend some time traveling the countryside in lieu of struggling for work. The longer you pursue a jaunt into transcendentalism, the greater chance you have at returning to society after the economy has improved. You may want to do it before next year’s graduates, however, as they look like a surly bunch.
At the very least, you are likely to know at least five people with a spare couch (especially if you know five underclassman with a Western Shore suite). In the world of waifs and strays, as in the world of business, it is not what you know, but who you know. Just make sure you know some people with better plans than you.